Walked to Live

Getting a job after Uni was a hard one for me. I stayed back in Awka because I was scared to leave my comfort zone. I was home, broke and lonely, not because I had nobody but nobody to call my own. My university relationship was over as soon as we wrote out last papers because she moved to the UK to join her husband and now we can’t talk because her husband cannot find out she likes women too.

I was going through that phase of rejection that comes when people realise you have no money or access they can exploit so they treat you like you matter but not that much. It was in the heat of these moments I met Kaycee.

I was at the Barbing salon to cut my hair, I was done with being a slay queen and now that I have no job I couldn’t keep up with being fancy but who knew low-cuts can be fancy too? Kaycee and her gang of friends were already at the salon when I got there; I greeted them casually and walked to take the empty seat by the exit door. She didn’t stop staring and I kept catching her each time she turned to look at me, she smiled or winked at me each time our eyes met. I wasn’t sure if I liked it or not but I decided to distract myself with my phone when a shadow covered me, I didn’t have to look up to know who it was.

Kaycee: Can I sit with you?

Me: Sure, you can.

She sat next to me and held out her palm for a handshake, smiling and still checking me out.

“My name is Kaycee, what’s yours?”

“My name is Joy,” I said, feigning ignorance of what she wanted but I didn’t think girls had become this liberal to approach another girl to ask her out, I enjoyed the thrill of it, I won’t lie.

“Can I have your number and maybe call you so we can hang out sometime?” She said while holding out her phone to me. I didn’t hesitate much as I took her phone and typed my number into it. She called the number to confirm and it rang a few seconds before she hung up, blushing hardly.


We met again at a hotel Bar and I was really amazed at how popular she was, the Waiters were more cautious with their service to us than they would usually be. After she dropped me off at home we agreed to see the next day. Before long she was taking me to exclusive places and we were partying with celebrities and the who-is-who in the city and nearby.


It happens so quickly with us, I was tired of doing life alone as well as frustrated with guys who wouldn’t take “No” for an answer and she on the other hand wants a calm girl with little to no stress. Her immediate ex was the daughter of a former governor who just relocated abroad, Kaycee was way out of my league.


“Kay” (that’s what I called her) was not born rich but her father’s house was bought over by the UN for a project and they were paid huge sums for their inconveniences. All her siblings are spread out each trying to grow their money as much as they can. Kaycee invested in a club in the biggest hotel in Awka, has a unisex high-class boutique and a gaming centre. She makes constant money and spends them lavishly.


You guessed right, girls were all over her, you don’t want to know the extent they would go to be noticed but the catch for Kay is that she isn’t one to have random sex. She sticks with one girl at a time. Before long we were travelling to Lagos for the weekend, Ghana for two weeks, and Maldives to celebrate birthdays. I couldn’t relate my life now to the life I had before that day I walked into the salon to get a haircut because I was getting too broke to keep up with beauty trends, Kay changed my life in days. I wore designer and dined in only exclusive venues.


All my family knew was that I recently ran into a friend from Secondary school whom I was helping run her business, I came and went as I pleased and so I spent my days mostly with Kay, as long as her schedule can accommodate me, we were always together.


After two months of literally living together I moved in with kay, it was bliss at first until the balls started to drop and the ugly days began for me. Kay had many friends who were studs too and would come to the house to chill all day, I can’t say if they all had means of income but they didn’t look broke, the house would be in constant echoes as her friends never left and she would make me cook. I didn’t have any problems with that and ran the house with love.


Since I didn’t have any job (Kay even made it clear I was never going to work for anybody) I took care of the home making sure she comes home every day to warm meals and a clean house and as the days went by I had nothing to look up to after my chores so I decided to pay for a course in a nearby training centre so it could be my own thing I did for myself but Kay kicked so hard against that.

“Why would you want to leave this house for any type of training? Do I not take good care of you? Are you lacking anything? Do you know how many girls in this city who want your life right now?” the questions were endless but she didn’t wait for me to answer any of them. She said very little to me for the following three days, I had to grovel and beg for forgiveness before she even agreed to look me in the face.

“Babe, I don’t like that I stay at home lazy all day. At least let me have something to distract myself. I am not ungrateful for all you do for me but I also don’t want this relationship to be the only thing I have going for me if not I will get bored. Please let me have this and I promise to skip on days you need me” I guess I beg right and asked at the right time because the next day we went to a training hub her friend recommended and I registered for a six weeks course on Programs management but I barely went on days Kay was in a bad mood.


Besides being the housekeeper and attending to her friends’ needs when they are around I also became Kay’s possession without knowing. I used to think it was okay if she doesn’t cook, wash or clean, even after herself because she was always busy making the money until one day I was very sick. She had hit me two days prior for going to my training even after she asked me to stay home. I had a test and needed to be there and even though I came back before her one of her friends had reported not meeting me at home when she came for breakfast. She was furious I disobeyed her and even more pissed I starved her friend and for the first time in my adult life someone hit me. I was shocked and broken but the next day she apologized grandly and I felt special again.


I got sick after she hit me at a club for talking with a friend from Uni while she waited. We had walked into a restaurant. I had seen my friend and sat a bit to catch up and didn’t even notice she was waiting. It was a sad date as she didn’t speak to me throughout. We got home and I tried to apologize as I didn’t see her waiting for me before sitting down, I came as soon as I noticed she was still standing. I remember it rained that night and I think I passed out; the last thing I remember was her swinging her power bank at me. I woke up with a crazy migraine and body aches. It took a while before it dawned on me what had happened and I broke down in tears.


I checked the house and she was nowhere at home, her car was out but two of her friends were around, “To keep an eye on me” they told me. Sleep and pain took over me until I heard screams of my name from my sleep. I woke up and dragged my body to the kitchen as fast as I could and standing by the door was Kay. “You don’t want to give us food today? How will I go out and come back to this house without having something to eat? Why didn’t you cook?” Kay kept barking her anger at me and all I could do was stand there and cry.

“Kay!! My whole body hurts. You beat me with mop stick last night, remember? See how my body is swollen and discoloured nah and you still want me to cook? Haba now” with that I walked back to the room, almost limping.


Her friend Omah came to the room to examine the injuries, they were all over my body and I saw in her eyes that she was sad about it, she left the room and a few seconds later I heard loud voices in the living room, it was between Kay and Omah but Omah left the house before I got there and I never saw her in the house since that day. The following day she sent me a text

 “I know your girlfriend is hot-tempered but know when to exit the stage with your dignity intact, I’m sorry you had to go through this phase. Be safe, Omah”


I didn’t know what to make of her message besides the fact that Omah was her only friend who calls her out on her wrongs, I’ve seen her challenge Kaycee many times and that is one of the reasons we are closer than the rest of her friends. After that second event, I knew I was on my own and needed to put in my best at my training which I did but not without a few fights with Kay but I stood my ground.


One morning, we were both supposed to leave the house together, and she was to drop me off on her way to her Boutique. I even got ready before her and after a particular call, she turned to say I had to stay home since she wouldn’t be passing my route due to a change in her plans. I insisted I would find my way and that started another fight and before I could say Jack Robinson I was on the floor for “challenging her orders”. I agreed to stay home, not because I couldn’t fight back but because I was fed up and needed to leave as soon as she goes out but she had other plans as well. She locked me in while going out. I sat still and cried my eyes out but I had to find a way or Kay would end up killing or worse still, injuring me in delicate places.


First, I parked all my belongings, and then it occurred to me to search the house for a spare key. I scavenged the house and tried every key I found until luck smiled at me and I got the right one. I ordered a ride and went home. My mother could tell something was wrong but I told her I fell from a bike to assuage her fears. I got out of my training three days later and Kay was parked by the entrance, as soon as I stepped out she called me from her car, I had ordered my ride home and didn’t answer her but went home, I made it clear to her in a message that I wanted nothing with her ever again.


After a week of her constant stalking, I decided to talk with her and boy was she sorry. She cried her eyes out and swore not to know what came over her but I didn’t want to go back to confirm if she was lying or not. I had taken enough body aches for the relationship and I was done, despite the good life she gave me but I chose life and I chose to stay open to finding the kind of happiness I deserve.


I didn’t just leave Kay because she hit me but because she is a rich kid, if she injures or kills me I would just become a part of the statistics and her family will take advantage of the corrupt systems and I would die for nothing so I walked without looking back so I can be here now, using the same certificate I fought to get to survive in Canada, yes I left. Omah helped me figure out my japa and I left using my Programs Management certificate.


I am proud that I survived that phase, it is till date the scariest moment of my life but I also learnt that there is no rosy ground when you are with a narcissist. Don’t get me wrong, I am not a perfect person but I would never hit someone I love or even intentionally hurt them and that was why I didn’t buy the story that couples fight all the time because that is not the kind of love I want and deserve.

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